


The Light of Day

by ashenprince



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Eventual Romance, M/M, Post-Timeskip (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Rating May Change, Slow Burn, Spoilers, Tags May Change, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-09-25 20:34:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20377693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashenprince/pseuds/ashenprince
Summary: Quietly, among the other church-goers, he prayed for some form of guidance.





	1. Miracles

It wasn’t often that Felix found himself roaming into the cathedral of Garreg Mach Monastery. The high vaulted ceilings towered above with excessively large windows that flooded light into the chamber below. Statues of holy figures from long ago staring down with empty eyes, hands pressed together in a silent prayer. 

But now, the building had fallen into disrepair. The once spotless interior was now cluttered with rubble along the far wall. There had been work done to repair some aspects of the cathedral, but it was a long way from being complete once more. Even so, now that the Blue Lions were using Garreg Mach as a base, people had begun flocking back to the cathedral once more. 

If Felix cared any way for the church, he probably would have found this building comforting in some way or another but he had never really thought of himself as a religious man.

Which made him wonder why he had wandered in there to begin with? After a long day of training, it was normal for him to just return to his room. 

Solemn hymns echoed within the chamber from the group of priests that stood in the large open space in the back of the cathedral. The smell of freshly burnt sage was easing in a way, seeing the white smoke rise from the thuribles that two priests were swinging as they made their way throughout the cathedral, speaking soft prayers. 

Felix made his way across the marble floor, his boots clacking against the surface as he walked. With all that was going on, no one really seemed to notice him. He stopped a few feet short of where the priests were singing their hymns, his eyes gazing up at the light that shone in from up above.

It was in places such as this that people typically searched for answers, right? He remembered as a child making prayers to the goddess with his family. When he was young, he has asked the goddess such childish questions about the world, always expecting an answer that he had hoped to receive. The last time he had even thought to pray to the goddess was when Glenn had died, asking once again for answers.

Why is it that Glenn had to die? Why did you take him? What am I supposed to do without him here?

Yet, not once did the goddess seem to answer.

That was when he realized that he’d have to find those answers on his own.

So, once more he questioned his reason for being in the cathedral. 

Pressing his palms together, he closed his eyes. For a long time, he stood there silently taking in the hymns that echoed within the chamber. It had been a long time since he had found the hymns soothing in any way, normally leaving no effect on him whatsoever. 

Quietly, among the other church-goers, he prayed for some form of guidance.

\--------

When he had made his way into the cathedral, Ashe was almost certain that he was seeing things. It was rare enough to find Felix within the cathedral itself yet the sight in front of him was not something he had thought he would see in a million years.

And yet there was a beauty to the sight before him, almost as if it were the scene straight from one of the many legends he had read in his lifetime. Felix stood there, among the rubble and the burning sage with the light shining into the chamber from above like a blessed saint. His head bowed low and his hands together, obviously deep in prayer. His hair lightly damp with sweat, a sign that he had recently been training. Or, in Ashe’s mind currently, after a tough battle.

Ashe was certain that he could stand there for hours watching Felix, imagining what it was that had brought him here at this very moment. To imagine what made Felix pray so intently. His mind was running wild. Even after all this time, there was so much about Felix that was still a mystery to him. What in the world was he praying for? Not once in the years that he had known him had he ever seen Felix pray before.

He just had to know. But it would be so rude of him to interrupt his prayers.

Ashe made his way up to where Felix was praying, standing a few feet beside him. It was close enough that he could see Felix up close but still not close enough that he’d be a bother to him. He’d sure hate to bother Felix right now. And up close it was a sight to behold. 

He held his gaze on Felix’s face, the often stern look on his face now seemed calm, the muscles relaxed. Some hair had fallen from his hair tie, falling in the way of his eyes. His lips moved as Felix whispered quietly, but his words were lost to the other sounds that filled the room. Oh, how curious he was, how he wanted to know what those words were.

As his eyes scanned over Felix’s features, there was a fluttering in his chest that was familiar to him. It seemed like nervousness, but why was he nervous? Even his face was beginning to feel warm. 

And that’s when he realized he was suddenly gazing into Felix’s open eyes. There was a long moment of silence between them, their eyes locked on one another. Felix’s hands slowly fell to his sides, his gaze unwavering.

“Ashe… Is there some reason why you’re staring like that?” Felix’s voice broke the silence that was between them, his voice raised only enough so that Ashe could hear him. That stern look had returned to his face almost immediately, his eyebrows furrowed together.

Oh goddess, oh no, had he made Felix angry? Of course he was going to get caught if he just stared at someone for that long. How had he even known though? Did Felix have some sort of sixth sense to that sort of thing? It was rude to just go staring at people though. 

“Come on. Out with it.” Felix placed a hand on his hip, leaning his weight more onto his right leg. 

Ashe took one step back, feeling the waves of annoyance radiating from Felix. “I swear I wasn’t staring at you for that long. It was… just a couple of minutes. I mean a minute. I…” As he tried to explain himself, it only felt as though he were digging himself into a deeper hole. “You were just…”

Felix sighed. “It’s fine. I really don’t care that much.” Felix looked away from Ashe, up once again towards the vaulted ceiling. “You don’t need to explain yourself.” 

Ashe followed Felix’s line of sight, trying to figure out if he could see what exactly it was that Felix was looking at. Unable to find it, he looked back at him. “I’m sorry but… If I’m going to be honest, I had never thought that I’d see you in prayer. I was so baffled by the sight that I couldn’t help but stare. I apologize.”

There was another silence between the two of them, much longer this time. But Ashe didn’t think of it as an uncomfortable silence. In fact, he never thought of the silences between them as uncomfortable. They just seemed natural.

“If it isn’t rude… May I ask why it is that you were praying?” Ashe inched himself a bit closer, hoping to bridge the small space between them. It was easier for them to talk quietly, at least that’s the way he rationalized it. “You always seemed like the type that had your life together. I can’t imagine that you’d need to ask the goddess for help.”

Ashe couldn’t help but notice the troubled look on Felix’s face. It wasn’t something that he got to see very often but he could tell immediately that something was bothering him. He really didn’t know if Felix would even tell him about whatever problems he was having. Were they close enough friends that he’d open up to him? Or were they just acquaintances, never to get past that first boundary into trust?

As he was lost in thought, he noticed Felix turning his attention back towards him. “Perhaps you could help me…”

That wasn’t at all what Ashe was expecting him to say.

\--------

It seemed as though the moment that Felix began to ask the goddess for a sign that Ashe had appeared at his side. At first he hadn’t noticed him. But as he quietly whispered his prayer, he couldn’t help but feel a set of eyes on him. When he caught Ashe’s gaze, he wondered if perhaps Ashe had been sent there by the goddess to help him.

What a stupid thought that was. Of course, it was just a coincidence. He wasn’t just about to believe that the goddess had sent Ashe to ease his troubles. 

After a few exchanged words though, he wondered to himself if Ashe would be able to help him after all. Ashe always wanted to learn more about knights, wanted to become a knight. 

“Would you… Would you be willing to make a short journey with me?” It was a difficult question to get out. He should have just made the journey by himself. But it was like Seteth had said, he needed to open up more with his allies. And out of everyone in the Blue Lions, there was something about Ashe that he couldn’t quite shake off. 

Perhaps it was from those conversations they had all those years ago, about the story that Glenn used to tell him as a child. If anything, it was a starting point. And with the war going on, making the journey alone would be treacherous. 

He didn’t dare look at Ashe’s reaction. Seeing the way he had already been flustered had been enough for him. “You are free to decline the invitation. I’m sure you have your own matters to attend to.” 

“I would love to!” There was an excitement in his voice that Ashe just couldn’t contain and it had almost startled Felix. “Where is it that you’re going? Is it somewhere far away?” Ashe had taken another step towards Felix and at that point he couldn’t help but stare into Ashe’s eyes.

Maybe it was a mistake after all. “There’s no need to be so eager. Jeez, you’re like a little kid.” He looked away from Ashe’s bright, wide eyes, his cheeks growing warm at the sight of him. “It’s not even that far away. I need to head back to my hometown. There’s something that I’ve left undone that… There’s something I need to settle with myself.”


	2. Memories

There was some time between when Felix had asked Ashe to join him on this personal mission and when they had left Garreg Mach that Ashe wondered if it had all been a dream. But every moment felt more and more real. They took two horses from the stables, one brown and one black, both with shaggy hair and decent saddles. It was so early in the morning that even the birds hadn't awoken yet, the sky dark with no hints of daylight yet.

The guards at the monastery gates waved them off without a care and their journey began.

There were many things that Ashe wanted to talk with him about, mainly the reason that they were headed back to Fraldarius territory. But it was still so early and he knew he had to focus. 

His eyes scanned the horizon as they rode on, watching as the sky slowly began to grow lighter with the coming of dawn. The birds sang their morning songs which brought a smile to Ashe's face. 

"Hey Felix…" Ashe watched as Felix tilted his head towards him, his eyes still turned towards the road ahead of them.

"What is it?" His voice sounded tired, almost as if he hadn't had enough sleep. It made Ashe frown. He would have to remember to force him to rest around lunch time.

"Can you tell me about your hometown? I've never been there before." Ashe couldn't help but sound a little excited. He truly loved traveling. He knew that once the war was over he'd want to travel all over. Yet there was a silence from Felix that he couldn't tell whether it was from annoyance or if he were just deep in thought. "You don't have to, of course! I just thought maybe we could talk a bit while we were traveling."

He watched as Felix slowed his horse to keep pace with Ashe. The expression on his face was calm and thoughtful, and there was another moment where Ashe couldn't pull his eyes away. He really needed to stop himself from staring…

\--------

As they rode into the north of Fodlan, they got closer to territory that was more familiar to Felix. The woods grew heavier and closer to the roadside, with less fields than near Garreg Mach. It was getting to the time of year where the land would be covered with snow for the entire season, the leaves already fallen from the trees. Red and gold foliage had already been cleared from the main roadways, piled high on the sides. As they passed small villages, the two of them watched as small children played together in the large piles of leaves, laughing happily together. 

“I doubt that there’s much of interest to talk about. It’s probably not that much different from where you grew up. Maybe a bit colder in the winter. But aside from that, it’s just like any other territory in the Kingdom.” Felix didn’t turn his gaze from the road as he spoke but he knew that Ashe was listening intently. He could feel his eyes on him, that gaze that seemed to easily be able to dig into his soul if he looked too closely. 

He highly doubted that Ashe knew what kind of effect that staring had on him. He couldn’t help but feel the need to close himself off more. It was a stupid idea, he thought, to think that Ashe would be able to figure out all the secrets he wanted to keep with just a simple look.

“Every place is different, Felix. I don’t think you’re looking close enough.” Felix turned as he heard a small laugh from Ashe. He was just quick enough to catch the happy smile that was on Ashe’s face. “Surely there’s something you find special about where you’re from. Perhaps a memory from your childhood, or…” 

Perhaps it was the look on his own face that forced Ashe to cut himself off. 

“Or… Or, um…” Ashe looked as though he was trying to backtrack through his thoughts, trying to find a conversation topic that didn’t seem overly sensitive. “Um…”

“I do have a few good childhood memories…” Felix looked forward once more, keeping his voice low as he spoke. It wasn’t often that he looked back on his childhood. For the past few years, he tried to forget most of what had happened back then. But it wasn’t like it was all bad. In fact, most of his childhood he remembered being happy. “I told you that my brother used to read me that old storybook, yeah?”

“Oh yeah! You did mention that a long time ago. Your brother’s name was Glenn, yes? Everyone mentions him in passing but… I never really hear much about him aside from his name.” 

“You probably would have liked him a lot…” As Felix spoke those words, he couldn’t help but hate that he spoke them. There didn’t seem to be a reason why he felt that way. At least not a reason that he could pinpoint. Even so, thinking about it made his stomach turn. “He was the epitome of any character from a legend. Sure, he was a bit brusque and people had seen him as rude but he was strong and capable.”

It had been so long since he had thought of his brother in a positive light. Every time someone else had mentioned him and praised him, he couldn’t help but bring up the negatives of his brother. All his positive aspects are what brought about his demise. Perhaps that was why it felt so much easier to talk about the things that his brother did wrong. Perhaps if he brother didn’t have those positive aspects, like his loyalty or his strength, that he would still be alive.

“Felix? Is something wrong?” Ashe voice broke through the fog that were his thoughts and he quickly turned to look at Ashe with wide eyes. 

“Hmm?” 

“It’s nothing. You just stopped talking. Were you… Were you thinking about him? About your brother, I mean.” Ashe’s face was one of concern, his eyebrows furrowed and a frown on his lips. How he hated to see that look on his face, especially when he was the reason it was there. 

“I’m fine. I was just lost in thought. Where was I…?” Felix took in a deep breath, hoping that Ashe would stop looking so worried over him if he kept talking. “When I was really young, I looked up to my brother quite a bit. He was everything that I wanted to be. I…” Felix gritted his teeth together. Why was opening up to someone so difficult…?

\--------

Ashe had never expected to hear anything about Felix’s childhood from Felix himself. He stared in awe at Felix face as he learned small details about the way that Felix grew up. He learned the tiniest bit about Felix’s brother, Glenn, and how he was a knight that Ashe would have admired.

And suddenly, as they approached a small clearing to set up a spot to rest for lunch, Ashe noticed that Felix was looking in his direction. It had been a few minutes since they had stopped talking to search for a spot to rest, so it seemed a bit odd.

“Is something wrong, Felix?” He brought his horse to a halt, Felix stopping somewhat ahead of him. Was there something on his face? Oh, how embarrassing that would be…

“It’s nothing. It’s just that the more I think about it, you remind me a lot of how I was when I was a child.” And without another word, Felix swung his leg over the horse and stepped down to the ground, already walking away to hitch his horse to a tree nearby.

It was safe to say that Ashe’s face had grown redder than it had ever been before. Was that a compliment? An insult? It was so difficult to tell when Felix had spoken it without any hint of rudeness or sarcasm. 

Ashe took his time getting down to the ground, holding the reins for his horse, Laen, in his hands. He pet the horse's snout, thinking to himself as the horse nipped gently at his fingers. "What do you think he could have meant by that, Laen?" 

His eyes looked up to Laen's as if the horse could give him any other advice other than a snort or a soft neigh.

Ashe sighed, dejected. "Yeah, I didn't think asking you would really help… If I figure it out, I'll let you know." Ashe smiled kindly at the horse, feeding it a small sugar cube from his pocket before hitching him to the tree. "That is… if I can figure it out…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for the kind comments on the first chapter ;-; it was very sweet and i honestly didn't expect anything. i promise to add more chapters in the future~


End file.
